Sunday, August 26, 2007
dreams oh dreams. why do ppl dream? cant i juz fall aslp like how normal ppl do? i onli hope for a good nitez rest.
guess i m used to turnin in early - before 1am
and wakin early - 7am
i get tired when the clock strikes twelve, even on weekends.
tink i m all drained out at work. sch's startin and i haven get ani suitable replacement yet. *troubled* added on my problems. dread how this world works. it's not fair. not sth i tot it was. where's my paradise?
headaches come more frequently. i will either die from stress or suicide.
放弃真的是另一种爱？放弃真的是另一种幸福？确切的说，放弃是另一种方式的拥有！
blabber jabber
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1:57 AM
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Saturday, August 25, 2007
wat a week..
mon:
mon was fine. everyting went smoothli wid the usual high volume of submissions. was thrilled when i heard tat a new temp will be comin on tues - my replacement!! finished work pretty late. juz to prepare a whole new tml for her.
tues:
i was late, as usual. she was there. sitting at my station, starin into blank. nobody bothered abt her. sat down, said 'HI!' .... ah.. she's young. 9teen. started off wid wat i'm mainli responsible for. SUBMISSIONS! took out my notes and she 'WOW-ed!' hahahaz.. i knew tat scared her. but i told her everyting's manageable. once you're good at it, you can burn all the notes. no worries.
took the whole mornin - 3 hours, juz to show her how to set up ONE bloody file. she was unresponsive throughout my 'teachings'.. she didnt like to copy down watever i said. but she cant recall them when i asked her. "PISSED" wat i had taught was onli an eighth of wat i had in my scope. was quite fed up wid her but i juz had to make do wid it. told evon abt her attitude, she noticed her indifference too. knew tat she wasnt 'tat rite one'. she went off for lunch at 12. we stayed back to 1pm as lilian had duty tat dae. amy called evon and asked, ' the work veri difficult ar? she says veri hard leiz...' UHHUH! she complained to amy straight after she had left for lunch.. wanted to leave for our lunch after she gets back. i cant let her slack tat hour away especially when i m not ard. 1.15pm - she wasnt back. lilian cant wait ani longer, so i left her a note. told her to call mi when she got back. 1.30pm - stil no call. i dun hae her number. *SHIT* nvm.... when we got back at 2. she juz got back too. "SUCH A COINCIDENCE!" she told mi tat she needed a word wid evon. okie, go ahead. she's waiting.
so GOOD BYE to my replacement. i had a better time after lunch without her. wasted my whole mornin. had to work til 9 juz to finish tues' work.
.
wed:
a new replacement will be here!! she was to report at 10pm. amy called mi and told mi the new ger will come in late - she was caught in a jam. okie, aniwae i had alot to do tat mornin. evon was away for course. the new ger came in at 1130. wat kind of jam? i nv bother to ask. now, tis one's onli 8teen. hopefulli tings will turn out well. i shall not steoretype all these teens. i m one too! hahaz.. wanted to make my job looks easier. taught her the easy tasks first. file location, checkin of mortgage and some easier filing. those no-brainer assignments. i let her to check on her own and she took a whole afternoon. at the end of the dae, she said tat it's boring. evon gave her the nite to consider if she wanted to cont or not. *i doubt she'll stay*
went to my new kid's place for tuition. angmo house near eunos station. *beautiful*
let's see how long tis can last.
thurs:
she came in at 845. her supposed time was 830. okie, i m always late too, i shall not make ani sarcastic remarks. her decision - work til fri, dun wish to cont. *fuck up attitude* if you wanna leave juz go. dun stay juz to earn tat few extra bucks. didnt bother to teach her aniting. sat beside mi and asked 1001 questions on wat i m doin, why we call tis 'submissions', why we hae to check mortgage, where did they come from,.. blah blahblah. * juz shut your gap!* i dun hae much time to entertain you. she made my blood boiled. had enuff of 'being interrogated'. i assigned her a SIMPLE task. since she said tat wat she had bein doin was borin, i decided to let her noe wat boring realli means. i let up my station for her. went into obiflow. she juz hae to check if every doc was scanned in and re scan those tat hadnt. the system is fuckin slow and she had to check them page by page. a file is abt 10cm thick. i have a drawer full of files for her to flow...
honestli, i hate to do tis, it's boring. furthermore, the system's slow and often hangs. tat's why i hae a truckload of them in my drawers. and a whole pile in the room.
for the whole dae - she checked 8 files. *splendid*
i was impressed of her speed. 8 files can take mi... ard 3 hours.
evon to her, 'you dun hae to come tml.'
i walked her out. she asked if evon was angry and why cant she cont for another dae. i replied wid a smile, 'nope. but it's better tis way. you wun waste animore of our time.' she had an interview tis sun - for the recuitment of SIA air stewardess. tat's why she wanted to stay another dae. aniwae, i dun tink she can even go thru the first rd of interview. i m not being bad, i m levelheaded.
fri:
no more replacement, for the time being. the whole office was filled wif blue and while balloons and attached to it - a mooncake from bakerzin.
*my own!*
*let's take a peek at the mooncake..*
*aahhh.. smooth pink 'snow-skin'
*a closer look before i wolfed it down*
*the first bite... OH! there's a white choco in it*
*and in it - was filled wid strawberry!!*
* 2 seconds later - all gone!!!*
finished everyting by 630 and i was off for tuition.
wat a week.. how i conclude - boring and complicated - tat's mi.
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wat's becomin of our younger generation? we are juz 1 or 2 year's different in age but our mindsets are a century a part. they come and go as and when they like. no sense of responsibility. no consideration for others. i onli realized it when i encountered these 2. well, nx week will be a better one, hopefulli. another ger's comin.
blabber jabber
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10:57 AM
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Sunday, August 19, 2007
part of bee's collection:
*i love these cute litte bottles*
these are glass bottles too. anitques.
*but.. they are cheaper*
after watchin the national rally for half an hour, i tink i have enuff. it's total bulls***
i dunnoe much abt politics stuff but listenin to some of his explanations and solutions for our aging population, i believe he's a contradict. 'one who owns a 3room flat will hae at least 160K of assets and tat will be sufficient for an elderly to enjoy a good life after his retirement.' did he mean they get to enjoy their old age wid 160K more without a roof?
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wellwellwell, mani tings happened recently. both good and bad. no matter wat, i believe i will be able to walk thru tis, strong.
2 more weeks before tis contract ends. been tinkin if i should cont for another week more. 1 more week of pay will not help much but at least... i dunnoe.
more meet ups and mj. some form of relax hour for a hard week at work. i dun like to slp over the weekends. felt tat it's a waste of time. hahaz. i have wasted enuff time on some nonsense ppl. it's time for mi to stop fretting and enjoy wat i hae ard mi - frenz family and more frenz..
been to ASTON. a great place to dine. they sell western fare at veriveriveri affordable prices. when i sae it's cheap, I MEAN IT'S DAMN CHEAP!! hahaz.. got to bring my gers there sometime. you're all in for good food man...
*medium rare sirloin - slow grilled over charcoals*
*sae: WwwWoooOoO my god!!*
*together wid their special mushroom sauce, i can tell you i hae nv tasted aniting better*
*chey, the usual - grilled chicken. i m biased! i love STEAKS!!*
jing and ali are away for their HOLIDAE~ aahhh! and i m stil stuck here, WORKING! i'd 'ordered' them to do my shopping on my behalf. hahaz.. since i cant be there, at least i got to enjoy the aftermath of their trip.. and fyi, they are not goin together, as in they are there wif their own families and will be goin to different places although they took the same flight - not together, understand?!?! retarded
God created Man. After some tots, he knew he could make it better and created Woman.
blabber jabber
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8:55 PM
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Have you been experiencing some bizarre dreams lately? Don't worry -- they aren't predictions of your future. They are simply signs that you have an extremely active subconscious right now. While you're living your day-to-day life and dealing with things as they come, your mind is working on some back-burner issues. All of your dramatic dreams could be happening right now because some of those back-burner issues need to be brought to the front burner.
realli?
blabber jabber
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2:30 AM
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SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One
Good-natured optimist.
Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome).
Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling.
Social and outgoing.
Doesn't like responsibilities.
Often fantasizes. Impatient.
Fun to be around. Having lots of friends.
Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules.
Sometimes hypocritical.
Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes.
Doesn't like being doubted.
Beautiful inside and out.
blabber jabber
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2:06 AM
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Monday, August 13, 2007
When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling;
live your life so that when you die, you're smiling and everyone around you is crying.
blabber jabber
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1:05 AM
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Sunday, August 12, 2007
did some planning... tinkin.... and listed the tings i hae to do. and.... it suddenli hit mi - BRACES!
omg. i m goin to put on my braces before sch starts. hmmm.. i had dragged tat for more den a yr. went for xrays and op last aug. i dun wanna push it back ani further. but lookin at wat's left in my bank book.. i doubt so.
IF i realli had it done in sept, i got to sacrifice lots of stuff. =(
soft baby food for 2 weeks. brushing after every meal. checkups every month. most of all, it will be PAINFUL! i tahan-ed it thru my op and i hope it will be MORE, mani times more, bearable.
my dentist told mi tat i need to hae it on for at least 3 yrs. WHY? becoz i started it too late. 老了比较难... ppl usually get it done when they're in their early teens - tweenagers. i m almost 2ty. no more in my teen yrs. aaahhh~ why can i be more decisive back den!
i need to hae my teeth straightened!!
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aniwae, work's been fine. i always tink of work on sundae nitez. hahaz.. becoz it's gonna be a whole new week when i wake up tml. dread work! i dun mind havin high volume of work. i dun mind slackin the dae away. wat i m afraid most is LUNCHTIME! i hate to lunch wif ppl i cant communicate wid. i dun like to act all smiley and happie juz so they will treat mi better. cant i even take a break durin tat hour tat i m not paid. i can do watever i like, wherever i wanna go but it means tat i m goin to spend tat hour ALONE!
forget abt my complains, i will juz put up wid their attitude and put on a good show for them. watch me perform~
Communication is primarily a function of trust, not a technique.
When trust is high, communication is easy - effective.
But when trust is low..
Communication is exhausting.
blabber jabber
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10:24 PM
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Your luck is continuing to be very good today, and you are getting used to having things go your way. This feeling of confidence is a huge boon to your creativity, so make sure you find some time to work out all your brilliant ideas. Put your thoughts down on paper, record your latest song, finishing knitting that scarf, or just whip up that fantastic cake recipe you've been saving for so long. Once you start exercising your creativity, your happiness will skyrocket even more.
doesnt it sound great? i will keep tis going...
blabber jabber
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3:57 AM
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minus my playtime - i'm left wid little time to slp. i dun mind gettin lesser rest. i juz wanna enjoy wat i can, wat i hae.
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THE SECRET is AWESOME! Jay is TALENTED! 我爱僷湘倫!!
i wanna watch it AGAIN!
thank you tzx.
went over to my cousin's place for tuition. met tzx at 3. we were supposed to be at cine by 315 to catch Alone den The Secret at 515.
plan A - failed.
TM's timing was abit late. but they didnt show Alone.
plan B - failed.
cabbed down to Cathay orchard. bought tic for The Secret, finally! but there wasnt ani slot for Alone. went down to sim lim to buy his MP3.
plan C - partially successful!
dinner at somewhere nice, before he had his confinement on sun. brought mi to a 'coffeeshop' kind of place, somewhere near.. er.. sunplaza. they serve chicken rice, you tiao, calamari, fried prawn, dumplings, blahblah blah... plain usual food hur? you're WRONGwrongwrong! they taste GREAT! i will bring you guys there some time, NX TIME!
plan D - successful-ly!
took a train down to lavander to meet allen. he had his shopping spree at the army market. spent almost all of his salary in 2 days.. flipped open his wallet and you'll see nth but receipts. and they were all dated on 10th and 11th aug. havin a gf is EXPENSIVE. so you'd better be prepared, financially.
walked ard bedok's pasar malam. BORING! was waiting for gugu for supper. drove down to simpang for pratas. finally, i had stepped onto bedok rd - simpang bedok. wooWoowOO~
too full for pratas, had teh iced instead. 'chilled' for an hour. it was damn cold. i was chilling, literally.
liao beez joined us at safra for pool. tys was damn COOL! he's capable of the impossible. he's my GF!! and i m so damn proud of him, er. i meant HER. hahahaz..
homezsweethomez at 1. everyone was tired. not mi. everyone hae plans for tml. not mi. saf had alr planned their sun. they didnt include mi. but it's okie. i can slack and enjoy my dvds. i hae a whole stack at homez. lalLAlalaALlalLA...
everyting seems fine. and i hope tis kind of peace will cont. no more heartaches. no more disturbance. juz mi and MY PRINCE, EDDY! hahaz.. ohohoh, and I'd watched The prince and mi. it's another love romance, so sweet and touching. guess i m pretty outdated.
nothing is as easy as it looks - dun be fooled by the appearance
blabber jabber
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2:15 AM
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Friday, August 10, 2007
i noe it's kind of late but still.....
HAPPIE 42ND BIRTHDAE, SINGAPORE!!
woke up early on 9th aug. shopped a little at bedok central. went down to liaoz bee hse. tys was there, learnin dota. it is a real dumbdumb game. *i noe the sims isnt ani better* BUT! they serve the same purpose - to past time.
wanted to plae mj but mr yeo was wif his gf. at first, he said he will be there by 4. i was there at 5 and i didnt see him. ringed him up and he promised to be there before 8. so... we started playin without him. my first 三角mj. hahaz.. it's damn easy to game. played a few rounds while watchin the national parade. the segment on the fireworks were.. juz okie. not tat magnificent as i tot it would be. guess it would hae been better if i was there. liao bee wanted to drive us down town to catch it but the tot of the jams - forget it!
allen and derwin joined us later at nitez. we didnt cont our mj. sat down. watchin tv. surfin net. playin wif their psp and fones. no words - juz the presence. it calms my mind.
we walked out to the main road. whole stretch of eateries. OAW! bee your place is GREAT! had dinner at xin wang. nobody likes xin wang but i dunnoe why we ended up eatin there. everyone tot someone wanted to eat there. hmmmmhmm.. WHO SAID TAT?
cont wid our mj - now 4. a short game and we were back to our tv.psp.laptop.fone. GUYS!
i noe you meant well. tys seldom ask mi out. you noe i cant stand boredom. and no way m i goin to stay homez for 1 full dae. i'll drive myself crazy. thank you.
slept for 4 hours and i m off to work! it's frifrifriDAY~
met jy and her redX ppl for dinner at crystal jade. MMMmmmMm..
love mi for a reason. let the reason be love.
blabber jabber
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11:38 PM
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Thursday, August 09, 2007
i had the weirdest 'dreams' over these past few weeks.
i call them nightmares.
i wasnt chase after by a stranger wid a knife or being strangled and hanged on a tree. they are unusual and odd. they always startled and woke mi up. sometimes, it was quite a shock tat i found myself gasping for air. there's a Chinese saying : 日有所思, 夜有所梦. but well, i nv tink much durin the dae. i dun even hae the time to. why is the past haunting mi, stil.
i always tot tat i had let go of the past. i tot tat i had regained my confidence. i tot you tink, who will confirm - a common army slang. i suppose i hadnt.
i m terribly disturbed whenever he resurfaces. i hadnt move on. i hate to be affected by him, stil. i hadnt move on. he makes mi feel miserable. i hadnt move on. lookin into tis mess - im the unfortunate one. stop treating yourself tis way. tis is totally unfair and unjust. he had everyting his way and you stil put up wid his shit.
NO MORE ROOM FOR ACCOMMODATION! i had enuff.
You'll see light at the end of the tunnel
blabber jabber
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1:29 PM
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You always say I’m unromantic
Don’t know ways to make a girl tick
I must say you’re right about this
For I am truly unpoetic... (la la la)
But I am not dumb (yai yai yai yai yai yai yai)
And not that stupid (doo doo doo)
It’s just that sometimes brain's not working (dooo dooo dooo)
So I didn’t sleep
Used my little wit
To write this little bit (Yai yai yai yai yai yai yai...)
You are my ice kachang (ice kachang)
In this tropical heat (my heart melts for you...)
You are my favourite dessert (ooh la la)
So inviting, so sweet
Would you like to bo bo cha cha (cha cha cha cha cha chambo)
Come along and dance with me (shoo bee doo wap shoo bee doo wap)
For you are my love
My tutti fruitti
Someone I’d like to eat
Every time when we go dating (sha bap sha bap)
First the movies then go shopping (shoo bee doo wap shoo bee doo wap)
You always hint - I’m unexciting (doo doo doo)
It has been so since the beginning (la la la)
But I am not dumb
And not so stupid
It's just that sometimes I’m a blur king
So I didn’t eat
Used my little wit
To write this little bit (Yai yai yai yai yai yai ya...)
You are my ice kachang (ice kachang)
In this tropical heat (my heart melts for you)
You are my favourite dessert (ooh la la)
So inviting, so sweet
Would you like to bo bo cha cha (cha cha cha cha cha chambo)
Come along and dance with me (shoo bee doo wap shoo bee doo wap)
For you are my love
My one atap chee
Someone I’d like to eat
Each time I look into your eyes
I see some pretty colours - very nice
I wouldn’t mind paying any price
I’m kachang over you (my sago honeydew)
You are my ice kachang (ice kachang)
In this tropical heat (my heart melts for you...)
You are my favourite dessert (ooh la la)
So inviting, so sweet
Would you like to bo bo cha cha (cha cha cha)
Come along and dance with me (shoo bee doo wap shoo bee doo wap)
For you are my love
My tutti fruitti
Someone I’d like to eat
Ice-kachang...
blabber jabber
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1:48 AM
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you will nv noe how miserable my life is.
you will nv noe how mani sleepless nitez i had becoz of you.
you will nv noe how hurtful your changes were.
you will nv noe, becoz you will nv see tis side of mi.
blabber jabber
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1:04 AM
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Monday, August 06, 2007
A person from the past is back todae - and he's still all tok and no actions.
blabber jabber
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1:17 AM
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Sunday, August 05, 2007
...........blundersBLUNDERSblunders
im a great big blunderer. i lost 1 submission on my first dae of work. brought out the wrong file from vault. file in the wrong docs for the wrong customer. typed in the wrong password and jammed the whole system. got the wrong file even thou i got the customer name rite. why muz 1 person buy some mani different apartments. and their addresses are so identical. same condo project name, same floor, but diff units. too much money hur! irritating!
how can i remember wat file i had setup in the mornin. i had came across far too mani files. Lee Tok Tan Meng Soon See Loo Hwang Mee blahblah blah.. I DUNNOE! but i remembered one-Pearson Ian Charles. becoz Pearson once said tat 'Put biz before altruism'. retarded.
i miss school. i hate to work. i miss life. i hate to work. i miss fun. i hate to work.
blabber jabber
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11:15 PM
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our BIG time at settler's.. (it was supposed to be a few months' back...i tink...)
as usual after our dinner, the group of us will be lost. no idea on where to go or what to do. hahahaz.. SO, we headed down to Settler's, Katong. tot tat it will be kind of rundown, eerie and small but it turned out tat all my assumptions were wrong. it was well lit and filled up wid ppl. luckily, there was a corner free for us to stay.. the friendli staffs introduced to us some NICE FUN and VIOLENT games. wWooOO, boy it was FUN! we teamed up and played some sort of "SNAP" game, which is my fave! hahaz.. but my reaction tat nitez... tsk. maybe it was becoz i was grouped wid the blurblur-Jiaying. both of us juz looked on whenever it was time to "SNAP!" were we slow or wat? after several rounds, we were the big losers. HA! but there werent ani punishments.
we (juz the 3 of us, to be exact) took lots of photos there. tryin out funnie poses and stuff. the rest of them continued wif other games while we were happily snapping away....~~
*paperART*
*this is Ryan, my classmate in nursery*
*Mohan, my sec sch pal*
*and Kenneth, my childhood sweetheart*
*my darlin~*
*blurblur and mi*
to save our reputations, tat's all tat i can post here. HAHA!
Quailty of life cannot be achieved by taking the rite shortcut. there is no shortcut. but there's a path...
a meaningful life is not a matter of speed or efficiency.. but effectiveness
blabber jabber
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2:25 PM
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Saturday, August 04, 2007
Glancing out from the moving plane,
My otherwise calm heart seared with pain.
Fighting hard to conceal my sadness,
Struggling to keep my tears from flowing.
This battle is mine to face,
Alas! Alone all I stand.
Behind the mask of cheer and happiness,
Lies an air of pessimistic feel.
Encouragement can come in many forms,
But none is as good as a presence felt.
Oh! How comical irony sometimes is,
Everything feels so near yet so far.
When will I get to see the sun after rain?
I long for a hand to hold me through.
"There will always be someone.''
Someone you knew from the past.
Who holds a special place in your heart.
But will never be yours somehow.
blabber jabber
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12:42 AM
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Friday, August 03, 2007
i'd paid for your deeds. juz leave everyting behind and go on wid your life. you no longer hae aniting to do wid mi. i helped you onli as a fren.
you onli make yourself worse when you tried so hard to be like someone else. you denied the ugly side of the truth and tinks wat you did was absolutely rite. hope you can carry on tis way for another 10yrs. sooner or later, you'll onli lose yourself.
blabber jabber
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9:48 PM
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